Oh sleep training…
Believe it or not, this can be quite a controversial topic in the motherhood world. Some women get so upset about it. I’ve heard women say, “I couldn’t bare to let my baby cry that long!” (as if not sleep training their kids somehow makes them a more compassionate, caring mother). Recently I saw a tiktok of a mom talking about how if a baby is crying, they are not manipulating you, but that they need something, and that letting them cry it out is not healthy. There’s a little truth to that….but it’s only valid if the baby is under 4 months old.
According to our pediatrician, babies understand that they can manipulate you by crying once they are 4 months old (which is why you should NOT sleep train a baby under 4 months old). Now, I’m not a doctor (and you should always consult yours on any topic when it comes to your littles), but our pediatrician actually recommended that we let our children cry it out. She said that she did it with her kids, and that babies are actually really fast learners. They pick it up in a matter of days. In the words of our pediatrician, “They’ll either cry it out at 4 months old, or at 4 years old when they’re still sleeping in bed with you because you never sleep trained them.”
There are two ways (at least that I am aware of) to sleep train a baby. The first is to just allow them to completely cry it out. You don’t go into their rooms at all. The second way is the Ferber Method, which is what we did with our children. You can look it up yourself to find the charts, but basically you go check on your child in increasing time intervals as they cry. For example, the first night you go in after 3 minutes of crying, pat them on the back (do NOT pick them up), tell them it’s okay and then walk out. Then you wait 5 minutes before going back in and doing the same thing. Then you wait 10 minutes before going back in, and then go in every 10 minutes after that until they are done crying and asleep. The next night is the same, except instead of 3mins, 5mins, 10mins, and every 10mins after that, the intervals are 5 mins, 10mins, 12 mins, and every 12mins after that. The chart has increasing intervals for an entire week, but it is not uncommon for babies to be sleeping through the night already by night 3.
It only took Hollings 3 nights to start sleeping through the night completely. I must admit that we have been much more lenient with William’s sleep training, but we have gotten serious about it in the past week. 6 out of the past 7 nights he has stayed in his crib until 7am.
*IMPORTANT INFO* Once again, I am not a doctor so please do not take any of this as medical advice. This is just my own personal experience using the Ferber Method with my children. Always consult your own doctor before making any decisions for your kids. Also, do not let your baby cry it out if there is any big change going on for them (ie: they are sick, they have a tooth coming in, etc).
